Just recently I lost the friendship of a dear friend, after 20 plus years. At first, I was hurt, shocked and felt like someone had died. And in a way someone or should I say something had stopped existing. Yes, it was our friendship. I had changed and so had she. We have become strangers.
Then I remembered our good times and I smiled. In that life lesson I learned that just like the seasons, we change, we love, we learn, we cry, we laugh, we survive and more on. People move in and out of our lives. Some of the encounters are a blessing and other times, that friend can bring emotional and mental pain. If this is the case, one has to decide if it's worth the energy and time. That's when you know that its time have that important conversation with yourself and question, "Is it worth it?" It should not be hard to be someone's friend.
Moving forward, I know if the lesson is learned only then can one move forward onto more experiences in this journey of living life. You should think before speaking. Lead with your heart. Start your day with a prayer for God's protection and guidance. Love unconditionally and that kind of love will be returned to you. Give of yourself expecting nothing. Surround yourself with positive people and if that friend is negative, separate yourself and embrace all that is good.
John Frazier Entertainment Correspondent & Editor, Chit Chat Magazine
By John Frazier Sr. Entertainment Correspondent & Chief Editor
The Kennedy Honors Awards for 2009 was entertaining. It was great to see the Queen of Soul, Ms. Aretha Franklin honor opera diva, Grace Bumby. The Queen looked great, makeup and hair wise, but the 300 lbs on Ms Ree Ree looked unhealthy has caused concern, as her many fans and I'm sure, her family are worried.
The Queen is only 5'5". It was recently released that Jenny Craig wanted the soul diva as its spokesperson but, Ms. Franklin was quoted as saying, that the Jenny Craig meals tasted too good, the portions are too small and she couldn't stay on the diet plan.
Tony Enos long awaited CD, "Did It Rite", landed in my mailbox, autographed from Mr. Enos, himself and I must say that the CD is excellent. Of course, the parental advisory is printed on its cover, as it's an adult CD, one that you can just let play from start to finish. The CD sets the mood for lovers and for those who are looking for love. Vocals are great, lyrics are timely, sexual and if you are a lover of music, this should become a part of your music collection.
Well done, Mr. T., we, at "Chit Chat" are extremely proud of you. Candles, a fireplace burning, some wine or champagne, you and that special someone, and of course, "Did It Rite", playing in the background, makes a perfect evening for love and making love. Click for a quick listen:
Talk show host and newly "out" comedian, Wanda Sykes, is excited that African singer, Sade, is scheduled to release a new CD after a 10 year wait (and perhaps at the time of this "Chit Chat" issue, the CD may be in your retail stores). Ms. Sykes is pleading for Sade to perform on her late Saturday Night show. The single, "Solder of Love", is climbing the charts. I had to listen to it a few times before I started to like it. It has the old Sade flavor, nothing new is new, I guess. CD release date, February 8th. Mark your calendars. You want more Sade, click here: www.sade.com I can't believe that I can't stop playing Rihanna's latest CD, "Rated R". The music, the lyrics are personal, and vocally she sounds great. Her recent life experience is coming across loud and clear. Good job Rihanna.
Eminem agreed to delete the homophobic lyrics for the U.K. Festival event for 2010.
How about doing that for the rest of his music career, moving forward? Now haven't we traveled this road with Eminem before? Then we had Sir Elton John joining hands with Eminem, claiming freedom of speech, however, I don't believe hatred was what our forefathers had in mind or did they?
If the public would stop supporting anyone who preaches intense hostility against someone or a group of people who are different, only then will we see action for a positive change.
The amazing thing is that, according to Neilsen Soundscan, Eminem has been crowned the best selling rapper of the decade. Now come on , what happened to Jay Z?
The song in question is "Elevator", "Sorry, Lance (Bass), Mr. (Adam) Lambert and
(Clay) Aiken , ain't gonna make it/they getso mad, when I call them both fake/It's all these f-cking voices in my head, I can't take it/someone shut that f-cking baby up., before I shake it."
It's also been released that Sir John has been assisting Eminem with his fight with drugs for the last year. Are we supposed to feel some remorse for the rapper who continues to "hate" on us?
Why are we his target? Is he fighting something within himself? Eminem hasn't "outed" any black hip-hip artist. Why?
Because our gay black rappers are deep in the closet. And our "out" and proud gay black rappers are………. Oh, that's right, we don't have any "out" and proud black rappers. Must be in the "Kool Aid".
Asher Roth, a white rapper is gay and wants the world to know it. Mr. Roth was a part of the parade for Gay Rights during the Christmas holiday. In attendance, were Clay Aiken, REM's lead singer, Michael Stipe and the gay crowd's favorite, Lady GaGa. Roth came out of the closet during this time and has been dropped from his label, SRC Records.
Many may recall that I interviewed, author, Terrance Dean, "Hiding in Hip-Hop: Confession of A Down Low Brother", for GBMNews. Well now it has been posted on Mr. Dean's blog that Mr. Roth is the gay closeted rapper in his book.
I'm confused, I thought the closeted rapper was black.
Mr. Roth is currently living in the gay section of NYC, which means Chelsea, East or West Village, Tribeca, Soho or Noho and it's reported that since coming out, he's enjoying his new freedom, his new "open" and "out" life.
Rumors continue to fly as it came across my desk that T-Pain, Kanye West, Flo-Rida, Soulja Boy, Jody Breeze and Bow Wow are still believed by many to be bi-sexual or gay.
A baby mama, a few kids don't make you straight. And indicating that you are feeling "freaky" sexually doesn't make you less homosexual.
Nhojj is the first black male artist to win an OUTMusic Award from the Alliance of LGBT Recording Artists and Performers.
It is huge!
His song, "Love" was named R&B/Soul Song of the Year.
Women of color have won throughout the years, but this is the first for a male, which is a crying shame. Received a lovely note from Nhojj, quote, " I am excited to tell you that "Love" won the 2009 OutMusic Award for Outstanding R&B/Soul Song of the year.
I am especially happy because this marks the first time a black male has won an OMA - I couldn't ask for a better gift. Thank you for sharing this time with me and may the new year bring you all the success and happiness you can dream."
We at Chit Chat, are extremely happy to be a part of Nhojj's journey. We are so proud of him. Continued success! LOGO will televise, so check with your local stations. I remember saying to Nhojj that it would have been wonderful for him to perform with Mr. Michael Jackson, it would have been a great pairing.
Have you seen the Vanity Fair Tiger Woods cover? Like him or not, he's looking HOT! Will his infidelity kill his fabulous career? Has it murdered his marriage?
Tiger Woods is proving to be a real stud or as many might say, real male whore. Women are still coming forward. Rumor has it that his wife has hired the best attorney as a divorce is in view.
A close buddy said I was crazy when I said that I was waiting for the gay guys in Tiger's closet to come out. Now there's suppose to be "Tiger The Sex Video", Hold that Tiger! And the latest, a mistress claims that Tiger Woods has had gay encounters.
I'm not surprised due to his hunger for sex, however, I can only imagine the blond white guys lining up. So sorry guys, if you're black, brown, yellow, red or any combination, Mr. Woods isn't into you. Blond, blue need only apply.
Round-up
Beyonce's mom, the beautiful, Ms. Tina Knowles, 55, has filed for divorce as it appears, husband, Matthew, has gotten a young lady pregnant. This will be interesting to watch unfold. Divorce effect's not just the parents, but the children and everyone involved emotionally. But we don't know what life was like behind closed doors, do we? A 30 year old designer has claimed that Matthew Knowles, 58, in the father. Where's Maury?
Mary J. Blige is all over the place with her new great CD, "Stronger With Each Tear", 330,000 copies sold week one. She looks beautiful and sounds great. On every talk show that the hip-hop diva appears, I fall more and more in love with her. What a beautiful spirit. Ms. Blige's current CD is number one, making this her ninth number one CD. You better work girl!
The Princess and the Frog was number one at the box office on its first weekend's release, earning $27.9 million worldwide. This film has earned a Golden Globe nominee for Best Animated Feature. Anika Noni Rose, actress, dancer and singer is the voice and the likeness of the Princess and has gone down in history as the first black princess featured for Disney.
Bow Wow started the year 2010, off with a bang by firing his entire management team. The handsome, sexy, "I'm not gay with my man-pocket-book", rapper wrote on his Twitter page, "In one of those 'please don't f**k with me moods' today. I'm firing all managers! "I'm managing myself. Who knows me better than me? I know this game very well..."
The 22 year old entertainer needs to re-think his actions. Perhaps he should also reinvent himself. Putting negative energy out there, hating on others who are different isn't the way to go, especially in the entertainment industry, where we, "the gay folks", are everywhere doing everything.
Vivica A. Fox spoke to Mo'Nique on her show, about her relationship with 50 Cents. The relationship was intense and ended just as intense. Ms. Fox as she told the story, began to cry. The audience was loving it. Curtis as Vivica calls 50 Cents, telephoned her to apologize and now the two of them a friendly but I don't see them getting back together. The glass is cracked, you can't un-crack a glass.
Mo'Nique declared ALT the black Hollywood. Actor, director, Tyler Perry lives, recording artist, Monica, the Housewives of Atlantic (my personal favorite), and a host of other powerful black entertainers have made ALT the Mecca for African American's. I might have to relocate there myself.
Sean "Puffy" "Diddy" Combs is suing the landlord of the property where his "Sean John" store stands in Manhattan, NYC. According to the complaint, scaffolds were left in front of the store for an unreasonable amount of time, which caused lots of money to be lost. Mr. Combs is suing for, are you sitting down? $2.5 million in damages. Ouch!
Daddy Dearest, producer, singer, Teddy Riley's daughter, 18 year old, Taja, has accused him of beating her up. Where are the photos? Mr. Riley released a statement, "Due to recent events, I am compelled to respond in detail to accusations made against me, by my daughters, I love my daughters, but I will not allow my children to disrespect me in my home.
Contrary to what I have been accused of, I would never beat my children." "I didn't hit her, I collared her." She must have been extremely disrespectful. Daddy don't take no mess.
There's a $10,000 reward to anyone with information on the break in at rapper, Nelly's, St Louis mansion. Electronics and other duffel bag items were stolen. Was this an inside job? Where was the security?! Anyone with information should contact Crimestoppers.
Rakim has released a new CD "The Seventh Seal", first since 1999. He was a favorite with his unique rhymes, beats, sex appeal and beautiful blackness. Hopefully, my commenting on his beauty doesn't make him hate the gay community.
Many wondered why Oprah would not allow Chris Brown to appear on any future shows but she allowed gospel great BeBe Winans to appear with his sister CeCe. Mr. Winans was accused of assaulting his ex-wife, Debra Winans. Well, all allegations were dismissed.
Mr. Winans was quoted as saying, "This has been a trying year, beginning with the death of my father." "Even though this allegation has affected not just me, but also the entire Winans family, my children and certain aspects of my career. I chose to stay quiet because I knew the truth. To be exonerated of all charges shows the power of trusting in God, and is a wonderful Christmas for me and my children." To God be the glory.
Heather Headley, Broadway "The Lion King" diva, R&B artist and now gospel artist, it's said to have had the best Gospel CD for 2009, "Audience of One". She and gospel great, "Smokie Norful, who reminds one of the late Donny Hathaway, joined forces on song, "Jesus Is Love". This is definitely a CD to make part of your collection.
PBS aired Sam Cooke: Crossing Over, on January 11th. For many of our younger readers, this is a wonderful way to be exposed to the magic of Mr. Cooke. He was a church boy who crossed over from singing gospel as the lead singer of the famous, "the Soul Stirrers".
His signature sing is "A Change is Gonna Come". Unfortunately, his life came to an end when he was murdered. Some believe that it was mafia related. Other's believe it was because of drugs and women, "a white woman", from the dangerous side of the tracks. I don't think we will ever know the truth of his last day.
Tyra Banks has announced that she's leaving her talk-show. First Oprah, now Tyra, what are we going to do? As for black females to replace Oprah, perhaps Tyra was next in line, as she has the class, grace, sophistication, beauty and brains. The other ladies in waiting are either too ghetto or campy, something's missing.
Rumor has it that Janet Jackson and actor, Colin Farrell are dating.
Colin just returned from Dublin, in December 2009, after attending his gay brother's wedding celebration.
Now many of you may recall that last Summer, 2009, the new gay couple originally got married in Canada, since it was impossible to get married in Ireland. Could there be a wedding in the future for Janet and Colin?
Naomi Campbell is said to file for bankruptcy. A while ago for GBMNews, I reported that Ms. Campbell was dating a billionaire and the two had purchased a beautiful mansion as they played house. Even though the two hadn't separated, the modeling diva is said to be in financial trouble.
Perhaps she's not asking for help, as to prove her love for him, but whatever the reason, it will be interesting to see if he will rescue her. Also when the rich and famous file for bankruptcy, it's totally different than the common folk, she's not about to file for public assistance and food stamps. But we do wish her well. Everyone loves a great come-back story.
Just recently it was reported that Lady GaGa is a hermaphrodite. Wasn't it back in the day, that we heard rumors about Donna Summer having 3 nipples, Grace Jones being born a man, Madonna loving Latin boys, ( well that still might be true). Now there's a minister who claims that Lady GaGa is driving our youth, our gay youth, to hell.
If I thought this minister's views were important, carried some weight and had some truth, I might have printed his name…. Lady Gaga is on tour, "The Monster's Ball", she's all over the place, all over the world, click for locations, dates, times: http://ladygaga.com
Oprah's leaving her popular talk show but I have a feeling that this successful sister has other things ahead. "If living your best life were a test, I would not get a passing grade for 2009," the media queen confessed in the January 2010 edition of O: The Oprah Magazine.
"All the things I vowed to do this time last year, I didn't. I didn't give myself more balance or more time. I failed." Quote, the Queen of Media. After interviewing Charla Nash, the Connecticut victim, who's 200 lb chimpanzee attacked her, Ms. Oprah felt it was time to count her blessings and to also stop and smell the roses, perhaps to even make a greater difference.
Amy Winehouse has a new CD coming out for 2010. Along with a new CD, the singer is said to be purchasing a new pair of buns to match her newly purchased breast. It's an apple booty that she wants.
The words that come to mind, when I think about Ms. Mariah Carey's acceptance speech for her role in the movie, "Precious", is "go girl, enjoy yourself, live your life!" Yes, she was a bit tipsy, lovingly. Again, the media, implying that the diva had too much to drink, tired tearing down one of our great entertainers.
She's not the President of the United States, where she's suppose to be on best behavior at all times, not that this was bad behavior, she was only being human. By the way, Ms. Mariah has announced that she's going on 19 city tour for 2010, after a 3 year absence, starting from January in NYC. Click here for details.
The Huffington Post reported that Beyonce did a gig for a Terrorist this past New Year's Eve. The terrorist, who supports the Gaddafi Family, is said to have paid Ms. Knowles very nicely.
Say this isn't so. It's not like the diva needs the money or the exposure. This engagement took place in St. Barts, where other entertainers were present, Usher, Russell Simmons, Lindsay Lohan, Jon Bon Jovi. Now what's the whole truth? I have a feeling that the diva didn't know about her employers beliefs.
Not that we needed another one of these shows, but American Idol Winner, Fantasia, starts a new reality show. Everyone has a reality show or wants one. I guess it's the new way to jumpstart one's career. Fantasia is also a supporter in the gay community and is very well loved. Stay tuned.
Jennifer Lopez told "Latina" magazine that marriage isn't easy. The Bronx diva, quoted, "Anybody who's successful at it deserves a pat on the back," Lopez says. "You've got to grow with each other; you've gotta bend over backwards for each other."
It can't be easy when you have two entertainers in the marriage, ego's probably get in the way, especially when it comes to who's bringing in the most money and who's the bigger star. This is the third marriage for Ms. Lopez, she's married to Latin superstar, Marc Anthony and the two of them have twins.
The Black Eyed Peas are touring between the United States and Canada, currently till April 11, 2010. This group is amazing as it taps into every kind of music, and transcends every group. The group will also tour Europe. "I Got A Feeling" that the Grammy's will be rewarded for such excellent work. "Boom Boom Pow", need I say more.
While Ms. Alicia Keys is on tour, she's finding time to set up housekeeping with her boyfriend. Now supposedly, the boyfriend, Swizz Beats was married when he and Alicia hooked up. Beats wish that his soon to be ex-wife would leave Alicia out of it.
Amazing watching this brother mature as an artist, he's come a long way from the boy singing on the bus, with the headphones on, and drinking a Pepsi. Sexy chocolate soul singer, Tyrese was in a car crash. Thank God, no one was seriously hurt. After Tyrese was assured that no one was injured, they all want to a spa, his treat. Now that's class.
He's not music, but I thought I should mention this month's Essence's February magazine, the Men's issue. Yes, the sexy athletic Reggie Bush is on the cover, he's showing body, his chest, one nipple, this issue is not only for women, trust me.
I'm sure Essence's marketing people knew what they were doing. Now many will question why Mr. Bush is featured. He's involved with Kim Kardashian, who's White, she's shown that she loves our black brothers. It wasn't long ago that she was involved with Brandy's little brother, Ray J., then there was the sex tape that Ray J. and Kim made. Anyway, sex sells and Reggie is sexy.
The Neo-Soul Queen, Ms. Jill Scott is said to be release her fifth CD, "Light of The Sun" sometime this Spring or Summer. Along with this, "Why Did I Get Married 2" will hit the theaters on April 2nd.
Plus the singer, writer, poet, actress has been nominated for a NAACP award as outstanding actress for her lead role in her HBO series, "The No.1 Ladies Detective Agency. The diva has other things going on as well, but I thought I would just mention a few. She's indeed, fabulous and golden.
Michael Vick, who played for the Atlanta Falcons for 6 seasons, later disgraced for his association with illegal dog fighting has a reality show on BET called "The Michael Vick Project". Perhaps his show will give us a different view of the quarterback.
San Fran resident, Tony Haze told a Bay Area Reporter that he feels that television and radio personality, Wendy Williams, is not a real friend of the LGBT community. Williams during an interview with the Bay Area Reporter stated, "You need very visible, outspoken African American gays and lesbians, that will help convince some to support gay marriage.
You need some of these closeted gay ministers, the black ones, to get out and say it. Let's all vote together and make this happen." Haze continued, saying that he feels that Ms. Williams is using the LGBT for personal gain. Are you Ms. Williams?
First "American Idol's", William Hung became an overnight sensation due to his off key singing, now General Larry Platt, 62, sang for the Idol judges, "Pants on the Ground". This was a total surprise since the cut-off for auditions is 28. Now the "soon to be senior" may have entertainment opportunities. And he wasn't bad.
It was quite enjoyable. Head judge, Simon Cowell, told General (his nickname), "I don't think this is the last we'll hear from you". He also said that he felt that the song could become a surprise hit. Hopefully the message hits our youth hard as baggy loose waist pants, showing underwear and gold in the mouth and cap turned to the side is so played out.
D.J. Rob Swift's new CD, "The Architect" will be released on February 23rd on Ipecac Recordings. This is his first release since the mid 1990's. It's a blend of classical and hip-hop. Swift is no stranger to the music industry as he's worked with Herbie Hancock, Dan the Automator, the Blue Man Group, Cypress Hill, to name a few. Quote from his bio: Much in common with Mozart as it does with Grandmaster Flash. It will be interesting to see what happens with this amazing project. You Tube below:
Another reality show from one half of rap duo, "Salt and Pepper", Sandra (Pep) Denton, creatively titled, "Let's Talk about Pep". The feedback has been mixed as many feel that it's worse than, the guilty pleasure," The Flavor of Love" show. I happened to like its first offering. In my opinion it's a black, "Sex in the City", as you have four sisters in their late 30's and early 40's, searching for love.
Ms. Pep makes it a point to let the viewers know that she hasn't had sex in 4 years as she's on a manhunt for a soulmate. Fans are surprised that serious TV journalist, Jacque would take part in this kind of reality show. Joumana, newly divorced from NBA star, Jason Kidd appears to be the conservative one, whereas Kittie, who I've never heard of, is the wild, out of control one and will probably be the crowd favorite. All in all, it's mindless fun, check it out.
Singer, Keyshia Cole is expecting her first baby boy in March, with boyfriend, NBA, Daniel "Boobie" Gibson. Couple are engaged but no wedding date as of this posting.
Former Hunk from HBO's True Blood, Mehcad Brooks and Soul Food, the series, beauty, Nicole Ari Parker are part of the cast for the new ABC's nighttime series, "The Deep End".
The show takes place in LA, a law firm with 5 new, eager, fresh and beautiful "eye candy" associates who bring drama. Billy Zane heads up this comedy-drama on Thursday nights just before Grey's Anatomy. I hope Mehcad has a lot of scenes with his shirt off. Brooks has been outspoken about gay marriage, yes, he's for it!
First Kelly Rowland, now Michelle Williams, fires Beyonce's dad, Mathew. Kelly and Michelle have had separate success away from Destiny's Child, but not on the level of its lead singer and daughter of Mathew, Beyonce.
Williams, always the lady, released a statement, "From Destiny's Child to my solo career, I am grateful for everything Mathew & his team has done for me. We've shared great success together. However, as I move in a new direction in my career, I felt it was time. I wish Mathew Knowles & the Music Entertainment family all the best." We will be watching and wish Michelle the best.
Steve Harvey to replace current host on television's Family Fend and Mel B. to replace host on cable show, where the overweight folks dance to lose pounds. Now will I watch either of these shows? No, but I thought you might want to know anyway.
Rumor, rumor, Jamie Fox to replace Simon Cowell on American Idol? Say it isn't so! Now I know the "Jamie" fans will probably send me some hate mail but I 'm not "hating", I just don't get it.
NFL Star Eric Green, 27 accused by drag queen, Angelina Mavilia, 38, of rape? Ms. Mavilia claims that Mr. Green invited her back to his condo, raped her then said that she better not tell anyone. Girlfriend is suing for $10M. Sounds like she said, he said. This will be interesting to watch as it unfolds.
Legend, Etta James, 72, is in the hospital for undergoing drug treatment cause by a urinary tract infection. She was on painkillers and developed a dependency. Get well soon, my lady.
Disney teen idol, Selena Gomez and the Scene have remixed her hit, "Naturally", and it's a club hit naturally. She's part of that new generation of young money super stars. Her close girlfriend is Taylor Swift. If you're a fan of Ms. Swift, you will definitely like Selena.
1960's, Funk master legend, Sly Stone, 66, has filed a $50 Million against his former money keeper, Jerry Goldstein, manager. Mr. Stone claims that he's been ripped off for the last 20 years, royalties and everything else money related.
I don't know why it's taken 20 years to discover this. It's like you have to hire a lawyer to watch your lawyer, an accountant to watch your accountant. As Labelle sang once upon a time, "Who's watching the watcher?"
By John Frazier Sr. Entertainment Correspondent & Chief Editor
For the many readers who may not be aware of the super talented and great, Ms. Scherrie Payne, let me give you a little background. She's the younger sister of legend, "Band of Gold", Ms. Freda Payne. Before she became co-leader of the Supremes, she was the lead singer for a group called, "The Glass House". "Stealing Moments", was the hit that was supposed to happen.
It has the Motown, Freda Payne, Holland, Dozier, Holland sound with a little extra something. Or should I say, someone and that someone is Scherrie Payne.
Many may remember the hit, "Crumbs Off the Table" recorded by singer, Laura Lee, of which was written by Scherrie. After Jean Terrell, who replaced Diana Ross, left the Supremes, Scherrie took the lead microphone and helped to create a new Supreme sound. The first hit from the first Supreme LP (1973-1977), was "He's My Man".
I can recall seeing them on the "Tonight Show" with the great Johnny Carson. I was so excited. And there was Ms. Scherrie Payne, no longer known for just being Freda's younger sister or for being the lead singer for a group not as popularly known, "The Glass House", she was in the lead singer for the most successful girl group of all time, "The Supremes".
The hits that followed were "Where Do I Go From Here?" (my favorite), "Let Me Heart Do The Walking" (High Energy), "You're My Driving Wheel", "Let Yourself Go", "Love I Never Knew You Could Feel So Good" (which had four Supremes, Mary, Scherrie, Susaye and Cindy), and also fan favorites, "Don't Want To Be Tied Down", "Color My World Blue" and "Can't Stop A Girl In Love".
Now the unique thing about adding Ms. Payne to the Supreme mix was that it with
Scherrie singing lead, it allowed original member, Ms. Mary Wilson and new member, Susaye Green (original member from New Birth "Until It's Time for You to Go"), to do some real fierce strong singing.
When the original member, Ms. Mary Wilson decided to go solo, Ms. Scherrie Payne and Ms. Susaye Green recorded their last LP on Motown, called, "Partners".
The material was excellent, where Scherrie was allowed to show some more of her writing talent, ("Another Life From Now"), but Motown didn't' give the album its exposure and push, but this didn't stop the diva from pursuing her quest, where she released the "Five Stairsteps" and later, Dee Dee Sharp classic, "I'm Not In Love". (Sister, Freda and former member, Mary sang background vocals.) This was a huge disco and club hit.
In later years, Scherrie and Lynda Lawrence (who replaced Cindy Birdsong for a moment) joined Ms. Diana Ross in the "Return to Love" tour that was thought by many to be the reunion of the Supremes.
Moving forward, Ms. Payne is still doing what she enjoys and does best and that's sing. I was able to land an interview with this most wonderful, beautiful, gifted lady.
INTERVIEW
John: How old were you when you realized that you were gifted with a voice to sing?
Scherrie: Wow, well my mother said I was singing before I could talk and that was in the crib, so I won't say it was then (laughing) I was too young to realize, so maybe, by the time I got in junior high school I think, my friends would always want me to sing and I thought it was no big deal but I would sing, it was between myself and this girl named Kelly Lee, but Althea was her name, at Hutching Junior High School, the same school that Aretha had gone to, my sister Freda and Holland, Dozier, Holland, so I think Junior High School.
John:. Where were you born?
Scherrie: I was born and raised in Detroit, that's what I'm talking about, the Big "D" and I don't mean Dallas, I mean Detroit, Michigan. (said with pride)
John: Do you play an instrument? And if yes, what?
Scherrie: The Piano, I haven't played in a while, I haven't played in the last few years. I guess I got into a mood, I don't why, I don't know if it was depression but I use to play every single day and I have not played in about 15 years. I keep telling myself that I'm going to go back.
I moved from my house into the townhouse, I downsized because I didn't have room for the piano, I let Freda take my piano. Then when I got the piano back…………I wrote a lot of songs on that piano.
John: I can remember the first time I heard your voice, a high school friend wanted to surprise me, as we always introduced each other to new artist. He played on the stereo, "Stealing Moments", with the group "Glasshouse". I remember saying it sounds like Freda Payne but?"
From that moment I've been a hooked fan of yours? Would you agree that you and your sister, Ms. Freda Payne, have a "family" tone, vocally?
Scherrie: Oh definitely yes, definitely yes, there were times I would call my mother on the telephone and she thought I was Freda, I would play along, I would fool her, I would pretend that I was Freda and then further down in the conversation, she would say, "Wait a minute, this isn't Freda!" (laughing at the memory) I would start laughing, I loved to do that.
Yes, we did sound quite a bit alike.
John: Now that I know your voice, since the 1970', I can now point it out on record, it's like,"That's Scherrie!" And what a voice, from what I've heard and read, "The Supremes (with Scherrie) when in Europe you're treated like Superstars, whereas here at home the public attention is a lot different. Is that a curse or a blessing?
Scherrie: Well its depends on how you look at it or where you are, in the United States its true, that you really don't get the accolades like you do in Europe or at the Asia countries like in Japan and I don't know why that is. I know that the jazz music, soul music, the Motown music is very much revered in Japan and the European countries.
But for some reason or another, I guess we've spoiled, we just have such an abundance of wonderful music that sometimes it's taken for granted, unfortunately. But we do have wonderful fans here in the United States as well, diehard fans, that I'm grateful for.
John: What male entertainer would you like to perform with?
Scherrie: Wow, he's gone…….. Marvin Gaye, then Nat King Cole, and I love Tony Bennett and Michael Buble, that's it.
John: What female entertainer would you like to perform with?
Scherrie: Wow, that's a good question…now growing up, my idols were Billie Holliday and Gloria Lynn, a renowned jazz singer, I loved Gloria Lynn, other than that, I don't have any other female singer that I would want to sing with. It was a honor to sing with Diana, my only regret was that my mother was not alive to see me perform with Diana, but my father was, he was really my stepfather but I called him daddy, he passed away the following year, I was so happy that he was able to be there.
John: Before a performance, how do you prepare?
Scherrie: Sometimes I vocalize, sometimes I just sing a little song, I really don't think about it much.
I really don't warm up. When I was with the Supremes, the first performance (on stage in front of an audience) would be my warm up, in preparation for the second show. I really should warm up.
John: Who were your idols as a child?
Scherrie: Billie Holliday and Gloria Lynn.
John: Ms. Scherrie, you have a strong, power, beautiful, soulful voice. Would you ever do Broadway?
Scherrie: Well it's sort of late now, but I remember years ago when we were (the Supremes) at Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas, George Faison (known for the choreograph for the Broadway hit, "the Wiz" and the personality and voice for the "Coke", cola commercial) told me after the show, he brought Broadway actress and singer, Rita Moreno with him and after the show, she told him, "That girl belongs on Broadway".
Well unfortunately, I never made it to Broadway. (But Ms. Payne is open to that possibility).
John: Will you ever write your life-story?
Scherrie: I would love to write my life story but like my mother use to say, if you can't say anything good don't say anything at all.
I would probably have some negative things to say about some people, so I would prefer to not say anything at all. Maybe one day I will. (Sounds like one day she just might, I can only imagine the stories and experiences that we would find exciting and interesting.)
John: If your life were made into a movie, which actress would you like to play you?
Scherrie: Oh my goodness, that's a hard one because they're so many wonderful black actresses out there. Maybe Nia Long, Regina King, Gabrielle Union, so many wonderful actresses out there, but that would be up to the director.
I would be so flattered and humbled that someone would even want to play me.
John: With your group, "Tourde4force", how is it different than working with the Supremes?
Scherrie: Well it's a totally different concept, The Supremes, The Former Ladies of the Supremes, Scherrie & Lynda of the Supremes, we are mainly doing "Supremes" music. With "Tourde4force" is a completely different concept, 5 people from different genre's, we are all friends who knew each other before, we sing different types of music, its non-Supreme and its more contemporary, original songs, it's a completely different flavor.
John: You are a prolific writer, I love the stories that you sing and write about, out of all the songs you've written, which is your favorite?
Scherrie: Wow, that's a tough one…….. I love "Another Life From Now," that's a true story, there are other songs that I've written that you've never heard, that have never been recorded that I love, "Penetrating Eyes", is another favorite of mine, that I've only performed one time, I don't have a copy of it, I performed it at "Sunset Junction" in L.A. I have other songs that I've recorded myself, personally. (She also has some favorites from the two musicals that she's written. Perhaps one day we will be blessed to hear them.)
John: "Another Life From On", is one of my top 10 favorites, I never get tired of listening to it. It's a song that needs to be played on the radio, its perfect.
Your voice, you do so much with it. I can't imagine any other person singing that song. That's your signature song for me. You feel the pain, the regret, the love, the experience allures you. Where did that kind of lyric and emotion come from?
Scherrie: True story from a relationship I had back in the 1970's for 7 ½ years, my experience with Lamont Dozier of Holland, Dozier, Holland, out of that experience came that song.
John: What's your favorite color?
Scherrie: Purple! (laughing) The color purple!
John: What's your favorite word?
Scherrie: Love, everyone states that, but my favorite word is "blessed".
John: What's your favorite country to travel to?
Scherrie: I love Japan, the next country is Italy.
John: What entertainer would you like to meet (That you haven't met)?
Scherrie: mmm, wow, that's another tough one. I don't think there's any entertainer that I haven't met that I want to meet. I've met Oprah who's fantastic. I would like to meet our President, Barack Obama. I would love to meet him.
John: Are you spiritual?
Scherrie: Yes, I am. I'm a born again Christian, I believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, He is my Savior. I am a child of God. At the end when we leave this earth, we will find out who was right and who was wrong, So everyone must follow his/her own path and I'm following mine and that's the path of Jesus Christ, that's the way I feel.
John: For up and coming entertainers, what advice would you give them?
Scherrie: To keep your passion alive. If I had known that I was going into music, I would have studied it instead of medicine. Learn about your craft and to also have a plan "B", just in case. Not everyone makes it to the top. Believe in yourself.
John: What's your favorite sound?
Scherrie: I love the sound of the violin, the love to hear birds singing in the morning, but not too early in the morning, because I don't like to get up too early. I love the sound of birds singing.
John: Will there ever been a Supreme reunion, the "Mary, Scherrie and Susaye" years?
Scherrie: Well, "Mary, Scherrie and Susaye" maybe so, that's possibly, but for the entire group, that's a definite no but "Mary, Scherrie and Susaye", who knows. Susaye does her own thing and does it beautifully, Susaye is so talented and still has that gorgeous voice of hers and Mary's sounding and singing better than ever, I'm really proud of her. So who knows, maybe for the fun of it, we might get together.
John: You've recorded with "Glasshouse", with "the Supremes", you did the partners LP with Susaye Greene, will you ever recorded a solo CD?
Scherrie: I would love to do that. I started doing that two years ago, but my voice wasn't ready at the time, I was having a lot of problems with my voice.
That's how Tourde4force came into play, my friends, they were sounding so good singing background for me, that we decided to make it a group effort., but I would love to do a solo project in the future.
John: Do you have a huge gay followings? And if so, why?
Scherrie: The Supremes always had a huge gay following, Some of my best friends are gay. (laughing)
John: What would your fans be surprised to learn about you?
Scherrie: Sometimes I get very moody, I like being alone, being a loner, like going to the movie's in the afternoon by myself. I like working on my screenplays, it's very relaxing.
I do things in periods, there was a time when I use to draw and paint, I haven't done that in a while. Then there was another period when I was writing songs and musicals. I like being creative.
John: If you were not a performer, what career choice do you think you would have entered?
Scherrie: I graduated from Michigan State, got a degree in Medical Technology in 1966 but I didn't want to do my internship in a hospital. Sometimes I wonder if I had not gone into music, what career choice would I have made.
I started teaching because my mother said, "You can't sit around here, you have to get a job". So I started teaching in Detroit, which I did for 3 years.
I would have loved to have been more serious about the medical field, would have loved working with children, being a public servant.
John: Do you have a message for your fans?
Scherrie: Don't give up on me, I'm not through yet, there's more to come from me. There's more to come!
Special thank you to my new friend and "Supreme" brother, Jim Saphin (UK representative). The" Scherrie Payne interview would not have happened without you.
For all bookings and enquiries, contact, Jim Saphin at tourde4force@aol.com
By John Frazier Sr. Entertainment Correspondent & Chief Editor
Many of us can recall the first time we heard, "Hang On to Your Love", or "My Love is King", it was a different time.
Then it's like our silk soulful sister, Sade, 51, just disappeared, she left the music industry.
According to her bio: For most of the past 20 years, Sade has prioritized her personal life over her professional career, releasing only three studio albums of new material during that period.
Her marriage to the Spanish film director, Carlos Scola Pliego in 1989; the birth of her daughter in 1996 and her early 21st century move from North London to rural Gloucestershire, where she now lives with a new partner,
have consumed much of her time and attention.
And quite rightly so. "You can only grow as an artist as long as you allow yourself the time to grow as a person, " Sade says.
We're all parents, our lives have all moved on. I couldn't have made Soldier of Love any time before now, and though it's been a long wait for the fans - and I am sorry that - I'm incredibly proud of it."
Comic, Wanda Sykes and millions of fans have been waiting for the Nigeria and English mix goddess of "silk soul" to return to the music industry.
It's hard to believe that Sade has only released 6 CD's; 1984: Diamond Life: 1985: Promise: 1988: Stronger Than Pride; 1992: Love Deluxe; 2000: Lover Rock and now just released on February 9, 2010: Soldier of Love.
Then of course, the other CD's, 1992: Remix Deluxe; 1994: The Best of Sade; 2002: Lovers Live.
The "Soldier Of Love" CD is a concept, mood product. Sade's vocals are crystal clear, the music is breathless and perfect. From the first song, my favorite, "The Moon And The Sky" is a wonderful way to get started. You are reminded why this diva is Queen.
There are no club songs on this CD. Most of the songs are slow and easy listening, great background music and also perfect for an evening of romance or a dinner party. This CD will find itself in the company of the 30 plus audience.
In the last week Ms. Sade has appeared on the David Letterman show, the View and most definitely will be appearing on other television shows. Perhaps the CD should have been titled, "The Return of Sade".
Now if you haven't purchased your copy of "Soldier Of Love", what are you waiting for? For quick listen-click here:
Yvonne Elliman's singing career began in 1969 in London where she performed at various bars and clubs. This led to a recording contract and later, in Miami, a close association as a backing vocalist for Eric Clapton.
She performed on many of his 1970s hits including "I Shot the Sheriff" and "Lay Down Sally". She sang the role of Mary Magdalene in the original album of Jesus Christ Superstar and in the subsequent Broadway and film version, and achieved her first hit single with the ballad "I Don't Know How to Love Him." This performance led to a 1974 Golden Globe nomination for Best Actress in a Musical or Comedy.
Her recording career began to take off from this point and she scored several hit singles throughout the world, including cover versions of the Barbara Lewis hit "Hello Stranger" and the Bee Gees' "Love Me."
Her biggest success came in 1977 with her #1 hit from the Saturday Night Fever soundtrack, "If I Can't Have You" which was also written by the Bee Gees.
The song was a big hit, rising to #1 in the Billboard Hot 100. Its success has resulted in Elliman being remembered as a disco artist, though this style of music was an exception to the medium-tempo ballads that she specialized in.
She appeared in a two-part episode of the television action series Hawaii Five-O during this period as an aspiring singer, performing the song "I Can't Get You Out of my Mind" with co-star James Darren.
The single "Savannah" was also a hit and demonstrated Elliman's attempts to move away from disco music and create music that focused more on her vocal abilities.
After a considerable hiatus, Elliman reappeared on the music scene. An album titled Simple Needs, with all songs written by Elliman, was released globally on June 12, 2007.
She has continued performing in music festivals, benefits and concerts throughout the country and around the world while calling Hawaii home again for the past nine years. She lives a peaceful life taking care of her elderly parents and cooking for her long-time boy friend, Allen Alexander, when she is not on the road.
I have always been able to appreciate the beauty of Yvonne Elliman's voice and music, as well as her obvious physical beauty. She can linger on a note, and sustain a purity of tone, that gets warmer, the longer she goes. She is raw and edgy in true 'rocker chick' style on songs like 'Can't Find My Way Back Home.' Check out the Youtube video of her singing this song.
It's also available on her CD "20th Century Masters - The Millennium Collection: The Best of Yvonne Elliman." She recently played in Los Angeles where I had a chance to finally meet up with, and work with, one of my long-time musical heroes. There was an instant connection. Hawaii's New First Lady of Song is an out-going, fun, warm, and beautiful soul with so much musical talent.
As it happens Eric Venturo is a major fan of Miss Elliman as well, so we had a lot of fun getting these shots and talking to her before she went on stage at the Hollywood Bowl.
INTERVIEW
Alan: Do you perform a lot in Hawaii?
Yvonne: They don't pay very well. All the musicians who live there have to have day jobs. I don't know why that is because you would think that the tourists would bring a lot of money into Hawaii.
Alan: Would you ever take a day job?
Yvonne: If the truth be known I do not want a regular job.
Alan: Would you ever go back to Broadway?
Yvonne: I don't want to repeat myself. That is why I was only on Broadway for six months. The producers knew I was too young to be doing eight shows a week. It can get to you. I wanted to change the blocking! (laughing)
Photo : Alan Mercer, Lighting: Eric Venturo
Alan: Is it true that you took a flat fee instead of a percentage for the original Jesus Christ Superstar album?
Yvonne: Yes I took $240.00. They spread it out on the desk like a deck of cards. I thought, 'Damn!' My manager and I were hungry. She told me, 'Darling, it's not very good. Take the money.' (laughing) We took the money and ran. We bought a case of Matusse wine and a bunch of steak. Then we had a party on top of the roof. It was the best time.
Alan: What do you remember about recording 'I Don't Know How To Love Him' and "Everything's Alright' for that small amount of pay?
Yvonne: We thought I would just do the songs real quick and I did record them in one take!?!
In and out so we thought it was great money for one hour of work. If I had received a lot of money in those days I might not be here today. I was a naughty girl.
Alan: You were wild.
Yvonne: Well I was an only child, a latch key kid, and when you are left-handed as well, watch out!
Alan: I understand that. It's only logical that when you were hanging out with Eric Clapton and people like that. There is no way you would not be 'living the life.'
Yvonne: Yes, you had to be one of the boys. It all went hand in hand. I couldn't be a rock 'n roller and not have a drink in one hand and a coke spoon in the other.
Alan: Do you feel more like a Rocker or a Pop star?
Yvonne: I've always been tagged 'Pop' but the 'Rock 'n Roll' heart was always there. When I went to London it was to be the first kick-ass, female electric guitar player. That's what I wanted to be.
Alan: What happened?
Yvonne: I got discovered! (more laughing) I used to go all around all the double-decker buses with just a fret board made of paper and practice the scales so I would know where the notes are. I heard Jimmy Hendrix did that with his fret board in his desk at school. I really wanted to play. I was learning Jimmy Page licks and getting it all together and of course that's when 'Superstar' came along, and it was a total different direction.
Photo : Alan Mercer, Lighting: Eric Venturo
Alan: Aren't you glad you did it?
Yvonne: 'Jesus Christ Superstar' ended up being totally brilliant, especially for Christianity. It brought a lot of young kids into the Church. I thought Mary Magdalene was Mary's Mom. That's the level of my education at the time. It did teach a lot of people that at least Jesus was a man. It was a good thing.
Alan: Many young people learned about the Bible from that show.
Yvonne: Is that right? I went to hospitals and actually had to touch this girl who had been in an accident and she wanted me there. The parents were praying for her to make it through...and she did. They gave me the credit. It was getting too heavy. I did that twice and I thought, no I can't do this anymore. I became an Agnostic actually. I was getting so much flack from people who were Buddhists and Krishna's. The 'God' thing was getting on my nerves.
Alan: It's called art.
Yvonne: It's called will the real God please stand up. I was so confused.
Alan: From 'Jesus Christ Superstar' to disco is a long way.
Yvonne: Don't forget there was Clapton in between. He was my idol and he asked me to be in his band. Talk about a freaking moment when you cannot speak! I had just been on an album of his and he featured me in two songs. I was riding an incredible wave. I'm on the road with Clapton for three and a half years and Robert Stigwood said to me, 'You have to leave the band and get a band of your own. You have two singles and they are climbing the charts. You have to go out and tour.'
Alan: How did Clapton react to this?
Yvonne: I had to tell him I was leaving and he got very mad. I did not want to leave. I'd be there today if I could. I'd be very happy if I was still doing that today. I love the man's music, but he got mad and I got to do my own thing which was totally different from his. There were no more Lear jets and trains waiting to take us to our five star hotels. I was on a bus and we shared rooms in hotels and played little bars when it was a freezing cold winter. It was very hard. I paid my dues. But then 'Saturday Night Fever' came along.
Alan: I remember a photo of you in Billboard magazine when you had your number one hit. You were with a group of executives and you were all holding up champagne flutes, celebrating.
Yvonne: Oh really!?! That was a 'trippy' day. I got a call early in the morning, 'You are number one with a bullet.'
Alan: Was it a dream come true?
Yvonne: Yes I had been waiting and waiting. I was watching that thing climb the charts and then get stuck. There was some heavy competition. So it was a relief when it made it to number one. I don't know if there was any payola going on and I didn't want to know if there was. Then I got the 'Hawaii 5-O' part because I had a number one hit. I was Yvonne Kanekoa! (laughing)
Alan: I remember that. I may have even seen some of it on YouTube. Now why did you move back to Hawaii?
Yvonne: I mainly just had to get out of LA. I was living on top of Decker Canyon in a decrepit house and we were being evicted. Time to go. I took that opportunity. It was like God answering a prayer. I also decided to stop singing songs that I wasn't crazy about. I want to just do songs that I love. I don't want to waste my time doing that and then what if something I do hits? If I don't like it I am stuck. That's how I got stuck in disco for so long.
Alan: Do you appreciate disco more now?
Yvonne: I can see now what the power of it is. It is very positive and that's great to have in this day and age when everything is so negative. Back then I was not as into it because I was a Rock 'n Roller' so I was ready to leave the disco thing behind.
Alan: What do you mean?
Yvonne: My songs are about being more aware. I don't know why. I have things to say I suppose, right? I did write a great love song for my boyfriend called, 'Just Right.' I'm really hot on that stuff.
I have an album's worth of material ready to go. I don't know why I can't just make that my priority and work on that. People want to record me over there for free. Come on let's just do it. I'm just not organized.
Alan: So you do have some music that you have already recorded?
Yvonne: I have demos of some songs that I am really excited about. It's just me and a guitar playing in the studio.
I am also in the process of writing a song called 'Elephant' because I love the elephant. I was called 'Yvonne Elephant' in school which was really terrible. It was a real drag.
Alan: What have you been doing musically the past few years?
Yvonne: I started to write music. I liked what I was doing. I was kind of scolding people.
Alan: Do you think we will hear some of this new music in 2010?
Yvonne: Thank you so much. I need a little encouragement because I am the perfectionist. The mood has to be right, the inspiration has to be right, I have to be in the right place.
That's not good. Sometimes you have to push yourself and force yourself because you can get surprises. I've got to finish the 'Elephant' song and 'Leave Lefty Alone' and then I'll be ready to record. There's nothing holding me back except myself.
Alan: Why don't you get into acting?
Yvonne: I don't know about acting.
Alan: You are a great actress.
Yvonne: I did the Hawaii 5-O part and of course I was in 'Superstar' but there was no talking, so when I did have to talk for the first time I thought it was really uncomfortable. I don't think I am going to pursue any acting. I have a hard enough time getting the music out.
Eric: Your voice has remained strong and clear.
Yvonne: They say it is the tone of my voice. For years I didn't know what people liked about my voice.
I don't have a huge range. I don't have the gymnastics that Whitney does.
Alan: Whatever is in your voice I know it is a warmth that I like.
Yvonne: Oh really. Thank you.
Eric: What was it like working with (photographer) Norman Seef?
Yvonne: Oh he was fast. He was about trying something different. He said, 'Let's take it outside.' He got me running down a hill where one boob is up.
Alan: Do you feel like Hawaii inspires you as an artist and are you there for the rest of your life?
Yvonne: Oh yes. I have been given such warmth and such a welcome. It's like being a big fish in a small pond. They fed me when I was at my most insecure point.
I needed to rebuild the confidence and that was the best place for me to be. I feel comfortable to be in my own skin there. I know what they are saying when they talk Pidgen.
My Mom and Dad are there. They are going through the old age stuff so it's a good time for me to be there for them.
Learn more about Yvonne Elliman on her MySpace pagee
Ron Perkov began his career as a backup singer for Dionne Warwick. He struck out on his own with "Dance with Me, Take Me Higher", a song that skyrocketed into the top ten on the Billboard Dance chart and introduced him to a new audience: dance fans. He gave the club world another gem with "Live, Luv, Dance".
"'Live, Luv, Dance' gave me a lot of exposure because it was a happy song," says the out singer.
"If you really listen to the words, they tell you what I'm all about.
Living lives the way we want to, loving whomever we want to love, and dancing to great music. This is my life and my motto."
This Valentine's Day, Ron Perkov unleashes his first full-length album. But dance fans may be surprised to learn it is not a dance floor album.
"Intimate Chill-Out" features the slow and sensual "I Get Off" along with standards like "Ipanema" and "LaVie En Rose". It's a step back to his Dionne Warwick days and oozes with sensual love.
INTERVIEW
Max: Love is a big theme in your new album, Intimate Chill Out. Ron: Love is the theme of my new album because love should be the theme in everyone's life. As they say, "spread the love". Give a little and hopefully you will get some back.
Max: i-Tunes awarded the album four stars. Ron: I know! I am so honored.
Max: What's your favorite track? Ron: "Come Live With Me" is beautiful. It's about enjoying true love, even if only for a day. I really do believe it is better to have loved for one day then never at all.
Max: Who knew the artist that brought us dance floor faves like "Live, Luv, Dance" and "Miss You" was such a mush? Ron: I have a lot to be grateful for. I am able to do what I love to do. I have great people in my life to share it with and I have the support of so many people. Who could ask for anything more?
Max: Your dance fans will appreciate the chill-out version of "Live, Luv, Dance" on the album. Ron: I did it especially for them. But I also think the chill out version stands well on its own. Who knows? Maybe fans of the chill out version will learn to appreciate dance music when they hear how cool the house version is.
Max: Why didn't you chill-out your dance floor hit from this summer, Miss You? Ron: "Miss You" came after Intimate Chill Out was completed. Also, I collaborated with DJ Tony Moran on the track. I would have liked his contribution on the chill out version - but you try getting a hold of Tony Moran with his grueling tour schedule! (Laughs).
Max: Do you believe you can find love on the dance floor? Ron: I think you can find love anywhere as long as your heart is open.
Max: Where did you meet your partner? Ron: On stage! He saw me in the musical "Anything Goes" and he hosted the cast party at the end of the run so he could meet me.
Max: When did you know it was the real thing? Ron: Right away. He and I are no BS kind of people; right to the point.
Max: Any wedding plans? Ron: It is funny that you ask. Yes! We are heading up to Boston to fill out the papers and then we have sixty days to tie the knot.
Max: How will you celebrate Valentines Day this year? Ron: We hope to spend it at home, alone. We get so few nights to enjoy…
Singer extraordinaire Patrick Basile, originally from upstate New York, has made Los Angeles his home for the past several years. I first heard his music on his MySpace page. I was overwhelmed at his ability to sing a standard and make it his own. His CD "Natural Man" is filled with one gorgeous cut after another.
I first photographed Patrick a year and a half ago. His (mostly) female fans all over the world fell in love with our shots. It's easy to see why. Patrick is a strikingly handsome Italian-American with chiseled good looks. For these new photos we went up to the top of Laurel Canyon and Mulholland.
INTERVIEW
Alan: Hi Patrick. You represent the new breed of recording artists who does mostly everything yourself. What do you think about this?
Patrick: Well it's a lot of work. More work than you can imagine. Fortunately I am able to produce my own recordings from the orchestrations, arrangements, and over-seeing everything else about the production, the control factor is wonderful but it would be nice to have a label putting the money behind it, and be able to collaborate with a company I trust.
Alan: Do you think having two heads is better than one?
Patrick: I produced my new CD, "Natural Man", but I had the renowned vocal coach "Seth Riggs", who has worked with artists like Ray Charles, Natalie Cole, Michael Jackson, Barbra Streisand, and Madonna, help me produce my voice.
I have his endorsement on the CD. It was wonderful to have another set of ears listening to my voice and telling me what I needed to re-sing for certain reasons.
It was great because after creating and working with arrangements, and orchestrations of the same songs for a period of months, you get ear fatigue.
He was able to watch over my voice. I was really pleased and very fortunate to have him on the project. He actually made my CD better!
Now to answer your question, "yes", having another set of ears is good. I can't forget my producer/engineer as well, "Maurice Gainen", who oversaw the "whole production". Having people work with you, who know what they are doing is the most important thing.
Alan: When you started the "Natural Man" project were you intimidated?
PB: No, I am never intimidated. I "love" challenges! It's the kind of thing that evolves as a piece of art. I tried my best not to over-control everything because that is not what art is about. I let things fall into place. I try to always be in the moment.
Alan: I love the fact that the CD is called "Natural Man" and yet most of the songs you recorded are associated with female singers.
Patrick: That's a good point, because I have always taken the precaution not to record songs by other well known "male" artists, because if you stay with songs associated with women, or other genres, you don't run the risk of comparison. I did the song "At Last", which belongs to Etta James, and it is one of the songs that is getting the most airplay from the album.
People love a male singer doing that song. The same thing has happened with "Cry Me A River", which gets me a lot of attention. It really is a song for a woman, but I knew that I could give it a "male" point of view.
It is funny, both male and female listeners, love my version of that song, and the music video that was produced for it.
Alan: I have heard that the composer of "CRY ME A RIVER" heard your recording of it.
Patrick: Yes, that is true. "Arthur Hamilton", who is the composer, heard it and called me. He told me he and his wife saw the music video, and it was one of the best versions of the song that he had ever heard! He endorsed it later when the CD came out, and said some wonderful things about me.
He said that I had a lot of passion and he felt I understood the meaning of the song. He also released a formal statement, saying that I bring "myself" into every song, making it truly my own. So many people have recorded that song.
I felt as if "Gershwin" was calling me! I love doing songs that are more obscure as well. I also like covering African American artist's material as well, for the same reason. They have their own distinct style and I have mine.
Alan: I know you have other big endorsements like Paul Williams.
Patrick: What a thrill it was to meet Paul Williams. Thanks to you, he heard my version of "Nice To Be Around." That song goes way back to when I was a teenager. I used to sing a lot of his material. Paul really loves the rendition I did. He wrote me a beautiful email thanking me for doing such a beautiful job on his music. I saved the email!
Alan: Didn't you record a new song recently?
Patrick: Yes I just did a cover of "Old Man River" that I am getting a lot of attention for. It is usually done by a baritone but I am a tenor. I always wanted to sing this song. I did a very ethereal arrangement, and I sang it in a higher key, and people loved the fact that it was so different.
The song is timeless and deals with all of our struggles. There is a second new song that I recorded recently called "What are you Doing The Rest Of Your Life". I am really getting a lot of positive feedback on this vocal, as it is "unlike" anything that I have recorded. It also has a more naked orchestration, than usual.
Alan: When does this CD get it's official release?
Patrick: My promoter (Cammy Reali) and I are releasing the CD to coincide with this new TV show I will be doing in January 2010 called "Back Home With Lisa Smith Putnam." It's a show like the old Merv Griffin, Dinah Shore style of variety shows. It's going to be filmed in Seattle in an old theater. I'm very excited about that.
Alan: Tell me about your Christmas CD.
Patrick: I did that about three years ago. That CD got a lot of accolades when I first recorded it. You only really get four weeks out of the year to promote and sell it. Usually artists record a Christmas CD after their first CD. I did it the other way around
Alan: What do you know about your fan base?
Patrick: I do know that MySpace is what got me started. I have a fan base from there, and "Facebook" now, which I believe will broaden when I have the music available on" i-Tunes" and "Amazon".
Right now I have the biggest fan base in the UK and Australia. I have over 28 radio stations playing my music. I have an offer to sing in Italy next year as well.
Alan: It seems like musical artists always break outside the US first. Why do you think this is?
Patrick: I think they are more open to new artists and different genres. I don't understand some of today's music. I like music that is melodic. Thank God for people like Diana Krall, Andrea Bocelli , Michael Buble, Streisand, and Tony Bennett who are stimulating the market with beautiful singing. I like many genres of music. Country is huge and there are a lot of really beautiful country songs now.
Alan: Some of today's music sounds the same to me.
Patrick: Yes it does. More so than ever now! I don't like too much repetitiveness in a song. However, there is a theory that you have to give people a kind of sameness to your album. They don't like too much variance. I once heard that a successful hit song consists of 80% of what they have heard before, and 20% new.
Alan: Getting back to your fans. Typically a good looking Italian man will have a large female fan base. Do you find this to be true?
Patrick: Yes I have a lot of female fans. I think it is about one third men and two thirds women. I have every kind of person of every age, and every race, from all over, who like my music. I love that! I'm getting emails from Indonesia from people telling me that they like my music and where can they get it.
That will be the good thing about getting the music on i-Tunes and Amazon. I can direct them there.
Alan: Do you consider yourself more of a recording artist or a performer?
Patrick: More of a recording artist, definitely. I do have performing talents that I haven't tapped into. I have done some acting in television, commercials, and plays as well. People say they like me on stage. They like my funny banter. I'm not like Hugh Jackman. He is more of an entertainer. I'm more of a recording artist like a young Tony Bennett.
Alan: Tell me about your own song-writing?
Patrick: I wrote a song called, "I'll Follow You" with "Rick Karatas" which is kind of a spiritual thing. We actually wrote three original songs for the CD. The "I'LL FOLLOW YOU" music video has over 3000 hits on YouTube so far.
It started out as a Christian song. It has a double meaning. It's a love song as well. A lot of people really love the song.
I edited the video too. I love doing that. You can really be creative. You can also see it on Myspace" and "Facebook".
Alan: Are you producing any artists?
Patrick: I am working with a cellist in the UK. We are doing a recording that is New Age with a Jazz edge. I am arranging, orchestrating, and pIaying all of the orchestral parts. I love doing this, but after a while there is only so much time in a day and all this work is extremely time consuming and exhausting. I have to keep my direction or I go crazy after a while.
Alan: Where would you like to see your career, say in five years?
Patrick: I'd love to be headlining in Las Vegas, and doing concerts. I would love to be featured with "Chris Botti". I just love his work, and he always features singers. I would like to do what he is doing now, performing all over the world with live orchestras. Concert's is where I will be.
Taborah keeps clubs jumping with an electrifying remake of Renee Geyer's 1981 dance classic, Say I Love You. The song, featuring Grammy-nominated percussionist Sammy Figueroa and remixes by John Rizzo and William Umana, releases to online retailers this week, in time for Valentine's Day.
"Say I Love You is about the importance of telling your partner those three magic words," said Taborah from her recording studio in New York City.
"Even though a person may know that they are loved, sometimes the head needs to hear what the heart is thinking."
It was the idea of Peter McLean (President of D1 Music, the label releasing the track) to re-make the classic track.
The original Say I Love You, written by Eddie Grant and sung by Aussie pop star Renee Geyer, was a huge hit Australia in 1981. McLean grew up loving the track for its strong musical and vocal hooks.
"The reggae/pop feel of Say I Love You is perfect for crossover appeal and the theme of the song is universal," explained Mr. McLean.
He and his music partner Keith Kemper re-worked the instrumental to modernize the track. It took some time, however, to find the perfect vocalist for the re-make.
After recording the 2009 remake of Ain't No Stoppin' Us Now with Taborah this summer, Peter McLean realized he had found his voice in Taborah. "We were in the recording studio when it dawned on me that Taborah's voice would be perfect for the song."
Taborah agreed to record; not only because she loved the song but because she could relate to its message.
"I was in a relationship recently where my boyfriend struggled every time he had to say the "L" word," she remembered. "When I said it to him he would respond by saying 'me too'. I would say to him, 'Oh, you love you too?' He just didn't get it."
She was also drawn to the song's emphasis on forgiveness.
"Forgiveness is an act of self, not a selfish act. It's something that must be done in order to heal and move forward. When you reach the point that you are able to forgive someone, than you have succeeded in reaching the ability to love unconditionally. To err is human, to forgive is love."
As far as when the right time is to say the words: "When you mean it," continued Taborah. "When you feel it and when you don't expect anything in return. You should never quiet the heart. Let it speak."
Say I Love You is Taborah's second single release with D1 Music. Last summer, she paired with R&B maestro Darryl D'Bonneau with a hands-in-the-air remake of the McFadden & Whitehead disco classic, Ain't No Stoppin' Us Now.
"We're not afraid to tell Taborah we love her," said Peter McLean. "She is a great artist and a wonderful friend. We work so well in the studio together and her amazing talent and awesome voice always exceeds my expectations. We definitely plan to record a full-length album with Taborah soon."
To further increase the international appeal of the track, Taborah also recorded the song in Spanish. Dime Te Amo releases to i-Tunes and additional online retailers this week, in time for Valentine's Day.
Say I Love You is expected to be another smash in D1Music's already impressive line-up of hits. The label released Lisa Hunt's Top 5 Billboard hit This Joint Is Jumpin, featured on the popular TV show, Queer As Folk.
D1 Music also unleashed the critically acclaimed mixed compilation Mixpoint by John Rizzo and the Club Christmas collection- remixed takes on holiday classics.
The Club Christmas albums hit the iTunes Top 50 Albums chart last year.
D1 Music's next release will be their first single with dance floor sensation Debby Holiday, due out in March.
By John Frazier Sr. Entertainment Correspondent & Chief Editor
A few months ago, I had the honor of interviewing the R&B, Pop Legend, Ms. Dee Dee Sharp. When I asked her who her favorite male singing partner was, she answered, Jerry Butler.
Wow, I thought. It was amazing sitting here chatting with Ms. Dee Dee and when she mentioned that name, "Jerry Butler", it took me back to my childhood in New York City, East/Spanish Harlem.
The music fabric on the background of my life was not only the Motown Sound but also the Philadelphia Sound and also the Chicago Sound.
The Supremes, the Four Tops, The Temptations, to Dee Dee Sharp, Jerry Butler, to the Staples Singers, The Impressions….but wait a minute, wasn't Jerry Butler part of "the Impressions", Mr. Curtis Mayfield and the sound of Chicago?
After a friend of mine came across some music recorded by Mr. Butler, he asked if I would do an article on this extremely, unique, gifted brother of color. No one sounds like him. What makes him so different?
His soft and strong sensitive deep baritone singing voice, captured all that heard it. Jerry Butler (Jr.) was born in Sunflower, Mississippi on December 8, 1939.
This is a year before my mother's birth. I fell in love with Jerry Butler's voice, he was one of my mother's favorite male singers. This was in the 1960's.
I remember my mother and her friends, sitting around the kitchen table, laughing and talking about Jerry Butler's performance at the Apollo theatre. Each lady that was present mentioned how "cool" and relaxed he was as he sang.
In time, he was known as the "Ice Man". The brother didn't even break into a sweat. Even though, his music was a part of our household, the first real memory was when he recorded, "Never Gonna Give You Up".
There was a birthday party, I had to be around 10, 11 years old and I knew at the party I would have my first slow dance. My mother taught me how to "two-step".
At the party, I asked, my close friend Skip's, girlfriend, Gwendolyn, to dance and on this slow record. What was I thinking? This was prior to the Jerry Springer show. You don't ask your close buddy's girl something like that.
Anyway, as I could see, the other kids were eager to run and tell that, I decided to tell Skip myself. He didn't care. Whenever I heard, "Never Gonna Give You Up", it takes me back to that moment in my childhood.
From that moment on as I matured, I continue to listen to Mr. Butler's music. Some of his songs spoke of the times at hand. "Only The Strong Survive", "Ain't Understanding Mellow", "Hey, Western Union Man" (Sounds of Philadelphia), and many other songs were written for the black man and black love.
Not to say that other's didn't enjoy his talent as well, but it felt wonderful to believe that his sound, his music, was written for us, for me. He, like his friend and brother, Mr. Curtis Mayfield and Mr. James Brown, were the voices of the new Afro American man and woman.
Jerry grew up in Chicago's Cabrini Green housing projects. Like many blacks in the 1950's, music was an escape, a way of life. He sang in church, with and where he met Curtis Mayfield. Because of their love for music and friendship and a few musical group changes, "The Impressions", the singing group was formed.
The Impressions signed with Vee-Jay Records and released their first gold hit record, written and sang lead by Mr. Jerry Butler, "For Your Precious Love". What I was surprised to discover is that Jerry co-wrote, with legend, Otis Redding, "I've Been Loving You Too Long" in 1965.
As a solo artist, Mr. Butler has been nominated for Grammy's, three times. He, like Dee Dee Sharp was a part of my mother's generation and then re-birthed in the 1980's, when he released disco classics, "One Night Affair" and "Coolin Out".
Other great musical projects were when he signed to "Motown" "Love On the Menu" the album is still one of my favorite's by him. No matter the label, Mr. Butler stayed true to his gift.
While with "Philadelphia International", in the 1980's, Mr. Butler produced, "Breaking and Entering" and "Easy Money" for Ms. Dee Dee Sharp. Both were huge club/dance hits. Also he wrote, "Was That All It Was" recorded by Ms. Jean Carne and this song is also featured in the blockbuster movie, "Precious".
Another way Mr. Butler serves his public, in the 1980's, he was elected in Chicago, as "Cook County Board Commissioner" and still serves. However, he has not stopped performing, PBS TV various musical programs such as "Rock Rhythm and Doo Wop", "40 Years of R&B", and others, has employed him thought-out the years. In 1991, he was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame".
Chicago is home for the legendary "Ice Man", along with his wife. He has two sons, and a grandson. And due to the magic of television, you can see him on any given night on PBS. The voice is like silk, still warms the heart and shakes the soul. To you the man with a heart of gold, Thank you Mr. "Ice Man" Butler for sharing your gift with us.
By John Frazier Sr. Entertainment Correspondent & Chief Editor,
I can remember this beautiful, beauty of fire and talent. Yes, Ms. Lola Falana. It was a Sammy Davis Jr. special, and she was dancing, singing and full of sexuality. Ms. Falana was raised in Philadelphia and born in Camden, New Jersey on September 11, 1942.
The black beauty is Afro American (mother) and Cuba (father). Birth certificate states her given name as Loletha Elayne Falana.
According to her bio, she left home as a teenager seeking fortune and fame but found herself living the hard life, as she slept at subway stations as she pursued work.
Her big break came through when she landed a part opposite Mr. Sammy Davis Jr. in Golden Boy in 1964. After she toured Italy and won fame in Europe in two Italian movies.
I believe what I remember most was that she was crowned "The First Lady of Las Vegas".
This was a black woman and this was in the 1970's, before Diana Ross and other divas that followed to grace the city of lights. She was the highest paid entertainer in Vegas.
Many may not remember but Ms. Falana, recorded for RCA records where she had a small hit called, "There's A Man Out There Who Can Turn Me On", and I loved this record. Unfortunately, this was not a break through hit, even though it was a wonderful R&B record.
During happier times, Lola married one of the brother's, Feliciano "Butch" Tavares, from the famous disco R&B group, The Taveras "More Than A Woman" and "Only Takes A Moment to Fall In Love", fame. (1971 to 1975-divorced, no children)
In 1985 Ms. Falana was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis which went into remission in
1987 but returned in 1996, of which during this time she went to live with her parents in Philly.
At this time, the entertainer retired from show business and turned her life over to serving God as she become an Evangelist and she, by God's grace, recovered from M.S.
She then relocated back to Vegas, as a private citizen as she continues to spread the word of God.
Lola has said that success in the entertainment industry did not bring her happiness. She has been quoted as saying that her mission on this earth is to serve God.
WHO IS LOLA FALANA? (You Tube interview in 2009 - Lola Falana meets with Director/Interviewer, Kevin O'Brien)
The history of tapas, dates back to the Middle Ages, when field workers would take a small meal with them into the fields, meant to be eaten as they worked, or on a short break.
Although details are not confirmed, some say tapas was born when due to an illness, the Spanish King, Alfonso the Wise, had to take small bites of food with some wine between meals and once he recovered from this illness, his royal decree was that wine served in any of the inns and taverns must be accompanied by something to eat.
Another story involved empty plates, when bartenders would cover wine glasses with small plates to protect the drink from fruit flies, then eventually, they covered the glasses with a slice of ham - which appealed to their customers, so bar owners began varying tapas on these empty plates and that was how, some say, how tapas started.
Many countries have comparable tiny starter-size dishes, like antipasto in Italy, hors d'oeuvres in France, dim sum in China,
and meze in Greece or Turkey, but tapas are more than just finger foods and appetizers.
A tapa is not a particular type of food, but rather a way of eating it - and this way of eating small portions of food, where the only restriction is the chef's imagination, is really relaxing, fun and informal!
Spain is nearly all surrounded by water, so seafood and shellfish plays a huge part in the cuisine and the selection of tapas served really depends on the region of Spain.
In Harlem Floridita Tapas, is without a doubt, really great food and atmosphere. Although not indicative of which region their tapas were inspired - there are over 40 to choose from. The staff is ultra friendly, its great for intimate dining and perfect for group gatherings.
The décor is mature, (dark wooden bar, tables and chairs) - a bit tavern-like with an Old World charm. With six types of sangria, a full bar, wine list, fabulous tapas, there really is no way to be disappointed, plus there is live entertainment (flamenco dancers) on Fridays.
Our waiter was really knowledgeable of the menu and very attentive. It was really difficult to decide from all that they offer. Their tapas range from $4-$16. They also have the option to choose 5 for $14.95 / add a half pitcher of Sangria for an extra $10.
So, you can just imagine our dilemma. Our waiter was very gracious, and we finally decided on 10 different tapas to share - and we had a salad as well - you must have your greens daily!
Chorizo a la Plancha (grilled Spanish sausage), Chorizo Salteado con Cebolla (cured Spanish sausage sauteed with onions), Calamar Frito (fried calamari), Gambas Al Ajillo (shrimp sauteed in garlic and virgin olive oil), Pulpo Vinagreta (octopus in a vinaigrette), Gambas a la Plancha (grilled shrimp), Croquetas de Pollo (chicken croquettes), Chicharron de Bacalao (fried chunk of fresh cod), Scallops a la Plancha (grilled scallops) and Chicharron de Pollo (fried chicken chunks).
I have no complaints about any of them - although I am not a huge fan of cod…they were all delicious!
Believe me once you start eating tapas, you won't stop until you're full - and if your eyes are bigger than your tummy (like mine) you will be sampling a huge array of these tiny tasty bites. I can't think of a better way of bringing people together and encouraging conversation!
So, whatever the true origin of tapas, and if you choose one or many, enjoy them like the Spanish do - with a glass of wine and a relaxed attitude!
Floridita Tapas 3219 Broadway New York, NY 10027 646-755-9355 212-662-0225
Visiting NYC and wondering where to eat? Perhaps Ms. Kwan has an answer for you
Turkish cuisine is largely the heritage of Ottoman cuisine, which can be described as a combination of Central Asian, Middle Eastern and Balkan cuisines.
The Ottomans fused various culinary traditions of their realm with influences from Middle Eastern cuisines, along with traditional Turkic elements from Central Asia (such as yogurt), creating a vast array of specialties and many with strong regional associations.
In researching Turkish cooking, I found one common denominator - the beauty in the simplicity of their basic cooking techniques. The food is not veiled under heavy sauces or covered by the overuse of herbs or spices…and in the taste the main ingredient comes to the forefront and the other flavorings is a 'hint' in the background.
Of the spices, lemony sumac, pepper, allspice, cinnamon and paprika powder are the most common. A favorite garnish is a drizzle of melted butter with a little paprika and perhaps a dash or two of cayenne. Onions play an important role in the dishes. Garlic, currants, tomatoes or even yoghurt add another dimension to flavoring possibilities.
The Turks of historical times led a nomadic life, dependent on agriculture and on the breeding of domestic animals. So, to dine on Turkish food is to dine on centuries old recipes. Ancient Greeks introduced wine cultivation in Anatolia, eastern Turkey.
The Persians introduced sweets, sugar, and rice. Skewered and roasted meats, the famous shis-kebab, show the nomadic heritage; as do flatbreads which are baked upon an overturned griddle called a sac. The sac is similar to a flattened wok.
"Yogurt" is a Turkish word, her most famous contribution to world cuisine. Yogurt made its way north to Bulgaria and Eastern Europe during the Ottoman occupation. Olive oil production is thousands of years old and part of the whole Mediterranean culture.
In Topkapi, the sultan's palace in Istanbul, chefs perfected these dishes with specialized recipes. Chefs would spend whole careers refining recipes such as pilafs, milk puddings, and desserts. Certain villages were known for producing chefs who would work in the palace.
As a result of this imperial cuisine, the general population had a raised expectation and appreciation for excellent food. This appreciation still continues today.
Though there is no singular food or method that can be instantly identified with Turkish food as in 'pasta' with Italy and 'sauces' with France, it is interesting to note that typically meat in small quantities is cooked with vegetables for flavor as well.
Turkish Cuisine is definitely a Jewel in New York City's Hell's Kitchen. It's a charming and cozy little place with great quality food, and many have enjoyed pre and post theater dining here for generations. The décor is colorful; there are many kitschy trinkets that adorn the walls, colorful table cloths to the point of too colorful but in a way add to the ambience - which is friendly, inviting and relaxed.
The service is great, a very friendly staff eager to explain the menu and tell you of their nightly specials. Order the spicy hummus and falafel (the BEST I've ever had - crunchy on the outside & creamy in the middle) - it is TOP notch. The warm flat bread is amazing. Try their appetizer platter. Their lamb and chicken entrees are always consistent - tender and spiced to perfection; the combo grill is my favorite. Don't miss out on the desserts, they are not on the menu, but the servers will bring you a tray of choices to choose from (the Baklava is so good here).
Turkish Cuisine 631 9th AveFrnt New York, NY 10036 (212) 397-9650 www.turkishcuisinenyc.com
Visiting NYC and wondering where to eat? Perhaps Ms. Kwan has an answer for you
Dear Omar: I just found out that someone that I'm interested in has slept around with more than a few people. I realize that there was life before me, however, I'm having a hard time separating his yesterday with our possible future. What should I do?
Didn't Mean to Turn You On
Dear Didn't Mean: I have found that honesty is the best policy. Hopefully you still want to befriend this person and maybe if you sit down and speak with him and just let him know that you're not interested in that way and that you really like him as a friend and would like to continue that relationship as such.
Maybe he will be respective to that approach. No one wants to be the bumper or the dumpy.
But we all have to go through it. When you do it make an evening of it and make it light and fun it's easier to give bad news when you're having a good time.
Dear Omar: I met this guy on the internet we talked for several days back and forth on this dating site, By the time we met face to face he was calling me baby.
I'm uncomfortable with that I don't feel we have known each other long enough for him to be addressing me in such a way, not to mention I believe that there is a conversation that we should have before we start addressing each other as such he's a nice guy and I do like him I'm just not sure if we are at this point in our friendship. Should I just call it off?
Don't know what to do
Dear Don't know: Well this is a very touchy subject and one you will need to address right away. Your friend is comfortable with calling you baby maybe because he may not know the seriousness such a word can mean. Some people use the words like saying hello. you will have to start with letting him know that you
Dear Omar: I have been talking to a guy for not even a week. He wants to be in a committed relationship and although that's what I want but unlike him I realize things like a relationship takes time.
He's already calling me baby and wants to hear from me everyday I have been up front with him and told him that a commitment comes with time but he is just seeing and hearing what he wants. I like him but I don't think its going to work. Not Ready
Dear Not Ready: I'm afraid your going have to do the one thing you do not want to do and that's just end your situation with him.
If he can't understand that you're not ready for a committed relationship then there is no reasoning with him. My suggestion would be to do it sooner than later.
Dear Omar: I of lately had been in the mood to make love. Passionate, sensual love. I love atmosphere lighting the fire place a glass of wine, good music, and good company and let the night set itself. The problem lies in that I am single, and men my age are only interested in the wham! Bam! Like any other guy I like that but there is more to sex than that isn't there?
Tired of the wham! Bam!
Dear Tired: You are looking for a mature crowded. You have grown up and graduated from school but you are still good friends with the senior classes 5 years later.
Meaning your hanging out with guys that aren't on your level of maturity. You should try finding more mature men. Men that are like mind and share your love for more passionate love making. Try other avenues outside of bars.
